Signs The Love In A Relationship Has Just Burnt Out

By Nick Hadji 7 months ago

1. The relationship's not bad...but it doesn't excite you

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In the beginning, it's like fireworks, it's so intense and exciting. Then after the honeymoon phase reality kinda hits and the once movie-like feel vanishes. While this is normal, it doesn't have to go from this to relationship burnout. When it's burnt out it just won't excite you anymore. There's nothing necessarily too WRONG with it, but is it right?Original content sourced from Femanin.com

2. Their once 'cute' habits now annoy you

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At the start, those little habits that your partner does aren't annoying at all, if anything they're quite endearing. But at this point, you've gone from the 'aww the way he sneezes so loud is so funny', 'ah, the way she slurps hot things is so cute', to... 'that's completely gross and annoying please stop that right now.' And even knew things you'd never even noticed before are suddenly really irritating you.

3. You both have a very predictable routine

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There's nothing wrong with routine but it's always good to insert some fun and spontaneity in at times. Going to the cinema on a Tuesday after work or a random date night at the weekend to keep things fun and fresh. These things break up the monotony which can very easily form in a long-term relationship and by the sounds of it you've hit this point.

4. You sometimes think about ending it

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When you start to think about ending your relationship or you start fantasizing about being single it's a string sign that says your relationship has burnt out. It's a sad reality because you inevitably have a lot of love for this person, but sometimes if it's burned out there may be no way to get it back on track and you should acknowledge these desires.

5. You don't look forward to spending time with them

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In a relationship, this person should be the person you want to spend the majority of your time with or you look forward to having some time together where it's just you and them. If you used to, and you don't anymore it's probably because your relationship has sadly fizzled out and that excitement for one another has evaporated. Maybe it even feels more like a chore.

6. You rarely have quality time

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You could be living with someone and spending time with someone but that does not mean that you necessarily are spending any quality time together. Quality time is when it's you and them, you're there enjoying each other's company and relishing the moment without other distractions. But a sign that your relationship has burned out is when you no longer do this anymore or make time for one another!

7. You even watch TV on different devices now

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When you're in a long-term relationship or you live together it's not realistic that all of your time together is spent on dates or having deep and meaningful chats all night, sometimes you want to watch tv together. And it's a nice relaxed bonding time in its own way. Yet if you've even come to the point where you don't even do this and you watch on different devices you're definitely experiencing a burned-out relationship.

8. Neither of you even hides your gross habits anymore

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Gross habits really do become clear after a while of being with your partner and it's totally natural that you soon learn they have bodily functions like the rest of humans. Yet it's good to keep a bit of grace to keep the passion alive. For example, doors open whilst one person is pooping, clipping toenails all over the floor, and wiping snot on your sleeve. But when you get to the point where you don't even care how gross you're being it may be a sign the relationship has burnt out...that or you're just SUPER comfortable.

9. You have regular conflicts

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Nobody wants to be in a relationship where conflicts happen all of the time. Nobody can be in a relationship where there aren't conflicts, but they shouldn't be happening daily. If it is it may be a case of the relationship burning out and you two becoming so fed up with each other that everything is annoying you and you just can't help but rub each other up the wrong way - no matter what you do!

10. There's a lack of bedroom antics

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Once the spark and the spice leave a relationship the intimacy may disappear meaning that there's no bedroom antics anymore. While this isn't the be-all and end all it's a super important part of a relationship to help grow closer and keep the bond between you alive! So when that side of the relationship goes, it's a big sign that the relationship may have burnt out.

11. The endearing pet names have gone

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'Babe, my love, bae, gorgeous' or any other pet/nickname which is way, WAY worse and much more puke-worthy were once probably your thing may be a thing of the past. And whilst it may be a blessing for those in earshot, it's a sad sign for you guys who may have lost that passion for one another and don't feel like calling each other by names of endearment.

12. You're always in a bad mood

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If you're always in a bad mood around your partner, but you're not in a bad mood around other people then it's time to question if they are making you happy anymore, or if the relationship has served its time. It's understandable that your partner sees more of your moods than other people because you two are so close. But they shouldn't be making you feel in a constant bad mood.

13. You don't feel like being affectionate

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This is a huge telltale sign when you don't want to be affectionate. Sometimes, it's like your body knows before your brain or before you dare to acknowledge that the relationship may have run its course. So you feel no urge to hug, cuddle, kiss, or display any sign of affection and you may even feel like pulling away when your partner tries to get close to you.

14. You don't even find them that funny anymore

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You used to laugh at all of their stupid jokes and think that they were just naturally hilarious. But now when they use the same jokes on you you think it's immature and their once naturally funny ways just grate on your nerves. You don't find them funny anymore and sadly this could well be a sign that your relationship has well and truly burnt out.

15. You used to spend hours talking, now you avoid it

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You know that feeling when you're madly in love and want to spend every second you can talking to this person? You feel like you could talk for hours on end and never get bored. You even stay up and ruin your sleep pattern just to speak to them! And now...you actually sometimes avoid having to talk. YOu can't be bothered and it certainly doesn't have the same appeal it once did.

16. Conversations are about mundane errands

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Perhaps it's because the conversations you now have are so mundane. For example, now the conversations often revolve around what errands you have to do today, the stairs need hoovering, the electrician is coming over to sort the TV, and we have no groceries left in the fridge. Everyday life has taken over romance completely and utterly making the conversation feel draining.

17. Now the goodbye 'I love you' just feels like an obligatory habit

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Ah remember the days when you missed them as soon as they would walk out the door, and you'd shout 'I love you' after them five times until they'd finally gone. Now these niceties just feel like a habit, you're saying them on autopilot rather than speaking what you truly feel. It's not as though you don't still love them...but it doesn't feel the same.

18. Heartfelt compliments are now 'you look fine'

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Yes, 'you look fine', don't ask me again. You look exactly the same as you have done for the however long we've been together (which feels like too long). Sometimes, when you're relationship burns out you forget (or can't) actually look at your partner as the attractive specimen you once thought that they were, now you just see them as looking 'fine'.

19. Romantic date nights are a thing of the past

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Romantic date night shouldn't be something that ends when the honeymoon period is over. Even if you have children, and you've been married for years it's still super important to have a romantic time where the two of you are alone. It may not be possible to do it often, but you should make the time. But in a burnt-out relationship date night will be a memory of the past.

20. You don't recognize the couple you used to be

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When you do reach this point it's sad because you'll look back at the two of you in the past and feel completely disconnected with them, like you do not even recognize the couple that you were back then. You'll feel no resemblance and you may feel as though the relationship looks absolutely nothing like it once did when you were madly in love with each other.

21. Now when they're out, you love the alone time rather than missing them

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'Oh, you're going out today, okay'...YAY, some alone time, I've got the house to myself and complete peace and quiet all day. And don't get us wrong, this can be very normal in any relationship to enjoy your own company and relish in the fact you have a day to yourself. But in combination with other things on this list, it could definitely be a sign.

22. Playful teasing has turned to jibes

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You can usually spot those couples who are still very much in love, have fun, and have a good relationship because they are playful with one another! The kind of flirty, playful teasing is a mark of affection and attraction. Now rather than this, it has been replaced with jibes and little insults because things irritate you rather than make you smile and laugh.

23. You'd rather engage in solo hobbies

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It's very important to still have solo hobbies and your own life rather than being consumed by the relationship. But a good balanced is when you have your own lives and hobbies, and also activities that you do together to find a good balance. However, you may have found that the joint activities have slowly diminished to 0 and now you only have your solo hobbies!

24. Frequent texts throughout the day are a thing of the past

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Naturally, the urge to text your partner at each second of the day does diminish. But it's nice to check in with each other because you still feel the desire for some kind of contact when you're apart. Unless, your experiencing a relationship burnout in which case, you do not feel like texting them at all with questions of 'how's your day going' or 'what are you up to?'.

25. You're both always complaining to each other

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The constant complaining never ends, it's just one thing after the other. It can be about super small things, or it could be about huge problems that seem to keep on arising over and over again. Whatever it's about, it creates a super draining and miserable effect for you both as the negativity seems to outweigh the positives in the relationship now.

26. You don't laugh together much anymore

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When the sounds of laughter evaporate from your relationship, it's time to reassess things because laughter is super important. When you do not laugh together it suggests that neither of you are enjoying each other's company anymore. When the enjoyment and the fun element of your relationship have gone, then perhaps it's a sign that you've simply outgrown one another.

27. Your patience with them is limited

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Patience, patience, patience, sometimes it is SO hard to have with your partner. It's completely normal to feel like your patience is wearing thin on occasions but if it has gone completely then it's not a good sign for the relationship because it's necessary to be able to resolve things without blowing them way out of proportion. Otherwise, unnecessary arguments arise from small things.

28. The flirtation and spark has gone

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Don't you wish you could keep that same spark burning alive between your forever so that the flirtatious days between you would never end? In some cases, this does happen. In others, the flame dims slightly through time (which is normal), and in other cases, it vanishes. When it vanishes...this could literally mean that your relationship has burnt out.

29. Sometimes you avoid having to be with them

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You realize they're coming home for lunch and you're working from home so you pretend to be in a meeting because you just can't deal with them. Unless you've had an argument, this is not normal behavior in a relationship. In fact, it should be the opposite! So if you feel like this and you want to avoid being with them then it certainly is a sign!

30. You don't have deep and meaningful chats anymore

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Not every day is the day for a deep and meaningful chat, in fact, sometimes it truly is the time to discuss which washing formula is the best. However, there should be times when the deep and meaningful chats occur naturally, it could be reminiscing together, talking about the future and your goals, or talking about how happy you both are that you met all that time ago.