Signs That Someone Was Raised By A Narcissist

By Aaron Love 11 months ago

They Have a Sense of Self-importance

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One of the most evident signs that you are being raised by a narcissist is grandiosity. Grandiosity is where someone has a mostly unrealistic sense of power and believe that they are the most important and powerful person. These people tend to think that they are a part of a special group that only the most unique people are allowed to be involved and therefore will only speak to or give their time to these peoples. Very often these people are only interested in being involved with people of a higher class or status. This would be a very traumatic experience for a child to realise when they are growing up and feeling heavily excluded from their parent.

Your Parents Live In Their Own Delusions

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It can bear very daunting looking back on your childhood and finding out that you were raised by a narcissist and one of the big signs of this is the level of delusion that some parents display. It may be possible that you were raised by a narcissist if they often spend a lot of time on their own thoughts and self-deception. By creating fantasies and their own delusion people are able to protect themselves from emotion and can truly believe that they are important and powerful. If their delusions are questioned then they may become defensive.

The Need For Constant Praise

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Are you sat there wondering why if you were someone who was raised by a parent who was constantly in need of praise and constant admiration. The mass sense of superiority that a narcissist possess is in need of constant reassurance and therefore may go out of their way to get it and become unpleasant to get the praise that they deserve. They would often try to receive any form of praise such as applause or simple well done or congratulations but often to fuel their egos they would have liked to receive this praise in public.

Exploiting People Without Feeling Guilty

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Did your parents ever show shame or guilt when they harmed or hurt others around them? If the answer is no then you may have been raised by a narcissist. A key sign of narcissism is if a person has no perception of other people's feelings and lacks the ability to empathise with others when they are feeling down or faced with adversity. This means that they do not think about how their actions affect other people. This can often be seen as a malicious act as narcissists often do not consider their own behaviour and how it affects others.

Commonly Being Seen As A Bully

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If you were made to feel fearful, intimidated or threatened by your parents when you were a child then that could also be a sign that the people who help you grow are also massive narcissists. This obsession with ensuring that other people in a narcissists life feel intimidated or belittled is way for them to try and gain power to ensure that they are the most superior in the room. This can also be a defence mechanism for a narcissist when they believe that their control is being questioned and at risk of being taken away from them.

They Often Feel Entitled

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A strong sense of entitlement and a deep rooted belief that they deserve everything that there is to gain in the world. These people when raising you may have expected you to favour them growing up rather than other friends or family members. If there is something that a narcissist decides they want then would expect to get it without any hardships. They may have also expected you to follow every single suggestion, instruction and rule they come up with without you questioning their decisions. Could you imagine being raised by this type of person?

Starting To Act Incredibly Extroverted

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Did your parents often spend the majority of their time socialising and being a social butterfly? There are many signs that can give you an insight into whether or not your guardian was a narcissist including being very extroverted. Whilst being quite social they are often overbearing and do not want to cooperate with different tasks. Due to how narcissists exaggerate their personalities so that others feel like they should be subservient to them. They often try to assert themselves onto other people and don't possess a lot of emotional intelligence

They Can Be Very Vulnerable

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Despite the egotistical and quite arrogant persona that narcissists show they are still quite vulnerable, therefore if, when growing up, you felt as though your parent was vulnerable in different social settings and when around certain people. Because of how controlling and dominant narcissists present themselves along with an overwhelming amount of social confidence this leaves them open to being ridiculed which can have a negative effect on their self-esteem. These types of narcissists are called overt-narcissists.

Do They Deeply Care About Fairness

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Did it often feel quite odd or strange when speaking to your parents or how they tried to ensure that you were treat fairly in all scenario? If so then you may have been raised by a narcissist. Known most commonly as communal narcissism is where a person believes that they are quite altruistic and want to treat others but more importantly ensure that they are treated as fair as anyone else. In order to gain fairness they present themselves as supportive but this comes from a sense of self desire and a want to gain social power.

They Are Highly competitive

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There is a vast majority of contrasting signs that could show a person to be narcissistic but if you pay close enough attention to your parents then maybe you might have been raised by one. A sign which contradicts the previous point is that some narcissists act very competitive and feel as though any act is a challenge when interacting socially believing that there are winners and losers for everything. Due to this mindset they are often perceived as being aggressive and hostile and often tend to hold a grudge.

They Have A Very Destructive Personality

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When you were growing up did your parents have the sort of personality where everything crumbled and broke around them? This could be a sign of a narcissist often referred to as malignant narcissism. These types of narcissists are often very fiery and they enjoy binging other people down and ensuring that they cannot find fun and excitement in the world. Due to this attitude and displays of aggression then they will often demonstrate very antisocial behaviours and do not care about anybody else's safety.

They Don't Care About Your Needs

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If when you were growing up you were often made to feel as though you did not matter and that no matter what your needs were they would never be taken care of, then this could have been an indication that you were raised by a narcissist. Often narcissists do not look for partners therefore when they get into relationships or have children they can often neglect their partners and worst of all ignore their children and not tend to their needs as parents should. So if you do not help to fulfil your narcissistic parents egos then you would be no use to them.

They Are Known To Be A Liar

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How would you know as a child if you were being raised by a narcissist? Well one way would be to try and identify if this is true is by paying attention to how often they would lie to you. They would often be considered as liars as they are known to distort the truth to benefit them and more importantly to bring great hurt and sadness to all of the people around them and more importantly to those who they are closest to. Therefore, if you know your parent is a narcissist then be careful to fall into their trap as they will often manipulate you.

They Do Not Care About Your Dreams

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Everybody wants to grow up dreaming of all of the impressive and wonderful things that they can do in their lives and it is a parents job to ensure that their children feel this way and are supported when they start to try and build towards their goals. But if your parents often tried to shoot down your ideas and make you feel as though you cannot achieve the job of your dreams then this could be a sign that you were raised by a narcissist. This may also result in you missing out on gifts during the holiday period and not receiving items you are interested in.

They See The World Very Differently

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It is commonly know in the world of mental health and psychiatrists that often narcissists do not view the world the same way that ordinary people do. They often have a more distorted and unrealistic outlook on the world around them. They will view that they are entitled to anything and everything that they want in this world. It is common for people with narcissistic tendencies to see the world as they want to see it and in a way that most benefits them and therefore may omit and ignore things that will harm how they see the world.

They Always Seek To Gain Control

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When you were growing up did your parents have issues with control and struggled to let other people make decisions for them or dictate their lives. Control is something that having a child can really take away and can make a parent act distant and cold to their child or become overbearing and dictate every aspect of their lives. To ensure that they maintain control over this around them these narcissists will put a great deal of time effort into rising to a position where they can gain this control and can become quite powerful.

They Take Advantage Of Other People

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Did you ever feel as though you were being used by a parent for their own personal gain and did not provide you with any benefit? Well, you may have been raised by a sociopathic narcissist. These narcissists quite frequently exploit other people for their own personal gain and do not care about the potentially horrifying damage that could be done to someone's life by being manipulated. As their child this would make you the most vulnerable to being victimised by a narcissist as you are an easier target and they have a greater access to your emotions.

They Have Absolutely No Morals

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We know many famous figures that lack a sense of morality and some of us may know people quite close to us who are lacking the right frame of mind, these people could even be those who raised you. Narcissists are known for their lack of morals and often there is nothing that they would not do or line they wouldn't cross in order to get what they want. This leaves them with a lack of direction in life, blurring the lines between good and bad, right and wrong which causes them to have a lack of empty for their actions.

They Struggle To Emote

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Knowing and dealing with our emotions can be a very heavy and daunting tasks at times and often we wish that we did not have to go through them. However, a lack of emotional range may be a sign of narcissism and if your parents struggled to express their feelings to you they may have narcissistic tendencies. This would have a very negative effect on your relationship with your parents as they would be unable to experience love and affection so you may not feel welcomed or cared for by them. This also leads them to accessing limited behaviours.

They View Others As Disposable

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We all got through our lives meeting different people and being involved in ever changing friendship groups, family relationships and romantic relationships. But if you notice that your parents have a revolving door of people in their lives and often see different people around the house, then this may be a sign that your parents may have been narcissists. However, these issues with holding onto people and forming lasting friendships also transfers to inanimate objects and possessions. They may not hold on to sentimental items like pictures.

They Do Not Like To Be Threatened

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It is never a nice thing when you are threatened, but it is more petrifying when someone you really care about is threatened like a friend or even worse your parents. However, their reactions to being threatened may tell you a lot about them and if they are possibly a narcissist. If being threatened was not bad enough then you will not like it when a narcissist is threatened as they become horribly dangerous and highly aggressive. They are susceptible to this aggression due to their lack of ability to trust others and paranoia.

They Love Negative Energy

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People are motivated by many different things more commonly praise. However, there are people who feed of the hatred and abuse that they see in the world or even that they receive or possible place into the world themselves. If your parents often thrived on the arguments and drama that would occur at home during your childhood and potentially even give them a sense of joy and excitement. This is a big narcissistic trait and can be often accompanied by mental health issues such as NPD and ADHD which can make a person very dangerous.

They Are Often Very Bored

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There is countless things in life that can leave bored and starved of joy or entertainment but those people who can be classified as narcissists are more prone to large spells of intense boredom than others. This is mostly due to their lack of ability to pay attention to one thing for a long period of time and can create a big issues when they are trying to engage in conversations with people as well as when they are doing any sort of activity. This lack of focus leaves them very restless. So if your parents displayed long spells of boredom then you may have been raised by a narcissist.

They Have Empty Hearts

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Now it can be quite common for us to feel as thought our hearts are empty at times but this is only temporary but for narcissists this is often a feeling that they cannot get rid of and follows them for their whole lives. Because of this endless feeling narcissists find it extremely difficult to build strong loving bonds with people and can cause them to be lonely for their entire lives. This sense of loneliness is why they act so empowered and controlling as they are trying mask their pain. Did you parents ever act this distant when growing up?

They Hate Being Ignored

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It can be difficult to know what type of person is raising you, but sometimes their actions and behaviours can be a big clue and it may even reveal that the person who raised and nurtured you is a complete narcissist. One sign that your parents could be narcissistic is that when they have asked you something or are wanting to know what you are doing they may often follow you around the house until they gathered the information that they wanted and have gained the attention from you that they have been craving.

They Are Complete Perfectionists

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Have you ever wondered why your parents or guardians act in certain ways and demonstrate sociopathic behaviours then you may have grown up with a narcissist as a parent. One way for you to figure out if you have been living with a narcissist is if when doing tasks and asking you to do certain activities or chores then they will always expect perfection. They have a very strict and narrow view of how the world should be and how everyone should act in it and if it is not to their perfect standard then they would become very irritated.

They Have A Complete Lack of Responsibility

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It is a crucial part of parenting to be completely responsible for not only their own actions but the actions of their family and specifically their children. So when you were growing up a huge sign that you were raised by a narcissist is if they never took any responsibility for the errors they made when raising you. This would have made it incredibly difficult to resolve any issues that occurred when parenting as they would try to make you feel guilty for they actions rather than them taking responsibility and helping you figure out the truth.

They Blame Others For Their Actions

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It can be a very difficult in life to figure out when you are right and when you are wrong. It can also be very hard to figure out what the positive and negative behaviours of a person are. If your parents have a blurred line between what is right and wrong then maybe they are narcissists. As a child we often do things wrong and this is part of helping us figure out life and how we should act but it can be detrimental to our development when our parents constantly blame their negative behaviours on their children and damage their perceptions of society.

They Are Often Scared

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Throughout our lives we often have a constant fear of many things but more importantly we are fearful of what other people think of them and how strangers may react to meeting you and the reaction they have. If your parents acted almost afraid and timid towards strangers and especially when talking about their thoughts and impressions of them then they may have narcissistic tendencies. This is because their reputation means everything to them and if they are ridiculed by others then it will bring down their confidence.

They May Struggle With Anxiety

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Anxiety is vastly becoming a more and more popularly talked about subject in the world and there is a great focus on how we are feeling. A person's anxiety, depending on how they project it, could be a very crucial sign that your parents have narcissistic tendencies and your grew up in an unstable household. Often narcissists struggle with anxiety as they are always overthinking what people think about them. When they do become anxious they project this energy onto their family and their more importantly their children in a quite negative and aggressive way.