Signs That Someone Is Being Made A Scapegoat

By Tom Pearson 8 months ago

Gas lighting

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The scapegoat may often be a victim of gaslighting. This is a process where one person convinces the scapegoat that they have said or done something, even though they have not. This is a form of psychological bullying and is a subtle way someone is victimized.

Being Ignored

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A scapegoat is often used to pin blame on and made into a victim, however when there is no need for them, they get ignored. This leaves the victim feeling unrecognized, like their thoughts, feelings and opinions on matter that may concern them are pointless.

Family Problems

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The scapegoat is often a victim at the hands of their own flesh and blood, their family! The family may take out their anger and frustrations on the scapegoat, and use them as a metaphorical or physical punching bag to cope with issues at home. Shocking!

Avoiding Conflict

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In many circumstances, a person who is targeted as a scapegoat will try and avoid all forms of conflict. This is to avoid an argument and yet more blame being placed on them. Although this is a sad side effect, the scapegoat may find comfort in keeping themselves to themselves.

Success Isn't Recognized

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Being a scapegoat at work is more common than you would think, as a bad management figure will find it easier to pin their failings on one person. The person targeted may often be left unrecognized for good work and could end up stuck in the same role for years.

Manipulated

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A common trait between all scapegoats is that they are manipulated easily. Sometimes this can take a while, but all scapegoats end up being manipulated in at least some capacity. This could be everything from handing over finances, to just a little like forcing them to do chores.

Triangulation

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Triangulation, or as it is more commonly known, is essentially being a third wheel. A couple will bring in a third person, the scapegoat, to be the reason for issues within their relationship. This leads to an unhealthy relationship for the third person and the couple.

Quietness

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You may notice that someone who is being made into the scapegoat has become a lot more quiet. This is because subconsciously, they do not want to get themselves into trouble and cause more issues (in essence, what they face as a scapegoat for someone else).

Shy

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A scapegoat may have been a shy person to begin with, which could be the reason they are now being targeted. If someone who was previously bubbly and outgoing is now shy and withdrawn from the things they used to enjoy, it could be that they are being targeted.

Refusing To Talk

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Refusing to speak is like the silent protest of a scapegoat. The mindset is that they can not bear the blame of saying the wrong thing if they say nothing at all. This also infuriates the person targeting them, making it less likely for the abuse and bullying to continue.

Angry

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If you suspect someone is being made a scapegoat, they may become angry or irritable when you bring it up. This is a fairly spot on indicator that they are being made into a scapegoat, as sometimes they do not even want to admit to themselves that this is going on.

Cast In A Bad Light

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When speaking with the people making someone into a scapegoat, you might find that they cast them in a negative light. This is unfair and is yet another good indicator that your suspicions are correct. The scapegoat will often seem innocent, and this is because they usually are.

Justifying The Situation

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It is common for the scapegoat to not want to admit to being in a vulnerable position. This is because many scapegoats are adults too, and feel weak for being in a position where they are effectively being bullied by another adult, which is completely understandable.

Anxious

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The scapegoat may come across as more anxious than usual, or may act in a nervy manner around you or with members of their family. This is a good way of them subconsciously showing that something is wrong, and that they need help without actually asking for it.

Internalizes Blame

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Internalizing blame is a common way for someone who is constantly blamed to deal with all of the shame that they feel. After weeks or months of being told that everything bad happening is your fault, you can understand why it gets to some people really..

Protective

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When blamed for everything, it is common for the scapegoat to find solace in one person, or even a pet. Due to the love they give and receive from this person, they become super protective and ensure that no one traps them like they have been trapped.

Questions Authority

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When explaining to authority that you are being made into a scapegoat, it is normal to feel ignored, as this can be tricky to prove. Scapegoats have a distrust and overall dislike for authority figures are they show themselves to be neither use nor ornament.

Strong Willed

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A scapegoat needs to have strong will power to put up with the ordeal they may be experiencing. You may notice that someone who previously had good will power is looking like they are beginning to flag, as if they are quickly running out of energy.

Empathetic

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A scapegoat will often be empathetic and be able to put themselves in the shoes of other people who may be going through the same experience. This empathy allows them to bond with other scapegoats and means that they can help one another through the situation.

Sensitive

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A scapegoat will be sensitive, they have been through a lot. This sensitive side may seem subdued, however this could just be due to the fact that they aren't yet ready to open up to someone for fear of getting hurt. With time, they may chose to open up to you.

No Ego

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A victim of being scapegoated will often not have an ego, and tends to think of others before they think of themselves. This means that they are great friends to have by your side, as they will look out for you and always have your back when you need them.

Not Arrogant

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Arrogance is a really ugly feature of someones personality, it shows that they believe the way they behave is above everyone else. This arrogance is never present among scapegoats, as if they were arrogant to begin with it is slowly ground out of them.

Self Harm

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Self harm is a nasty side effect of being turned into a scapegoat, and is ultimately a lasting reminder on how damaging it can be for our mental health. Self harm should be treated by a professional, like a therapist who can help them work through their problems.

Self Sabotage

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Self sabotage is the best way for a scapegoat to keep themselves out of harms way and in the safety of their own space. A scapegoat will often sabotage things like exams and doing work around the house so they can be excused and go back to a safe space.

Depressed

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Depression is yet another telling sign that someone is being blamed for everything, either by family, friends or a partner. Depression is more of a blanket term for a number of symptoms, but if someone is depressed consider if they could be a scapegoat.

Turns Into A Carer

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A scapegoat may be forced to turn into a full time carer for someone who they live with, like a dominant family member. This could result in the victim loosing out on their social life, as well as money and job opportunities as they are forced to be a slave for this person.

Hated At Home

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If the scapegoat is being picked on and victimized by members of their family, they might express how they are hated at home. This ranges from anything from name calling and emotional teasing, all the way to physical abuse and constant torturous days.

Struggles At Work

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Due to issues away from work, maybe with family or a partner, the scapegoat may lack concentration at work. This means that the work they produce may start to suffer, which could lead to worse consequences down the line, which would only make the situation worse.

Obsessive

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When turned into a scapegoat, you may find that the person in question becomes very obsessive around certain subjects. This could be cleaning, time keeping or anything else that never normally bothered them. This is one of the first tell tale signs.

Recluse

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The scapegoat may find it easier to be alone for long periods of time, and turn into a recluse. This means that they will find comfort in being alone for long periods of time. They may spend a long time alone, refusing to eat, shower or clean up for themselves.