How To Spot A Narcissistic Friend Before It Is Too Late

By Aaron Love 8 months ago

Constant Need For Attention

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If your friend seems to be constantly craving attention then they're probably displaying signs of narcissism. Their insatiable appetite for the spotlight within your group will make them look almost like a one-man show and you might end up getting a little annoyed with them in the long run.

Inflated Sense Of Self-Importance

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Have you ever noticed that your friend seems to believe that they're the bees knees? They'll never believe anything that they see or do is too big for them and they'll make anything they do seem so important. It could be just a trip to the shop but they might be doing something pretty useless.

No Empathy

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Have you ever tried sharing your feelings with someone like a friend and realised that they didn't really seem to be listening or understanding of your problems? They might even completely ignore everything you say and choose to start their own discussion over replying to you altogether.

Manipulative Behaviour

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One of the most common signs that someone is a little narcissistic is that they're manipulative. They'll try to twist conversations, situations and even relationships to suit their own needs and you'll end up just being their assistant (or at least that's how they'll hope it will end up).

Extravagant Fantasies

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Is your friend ever spouting out about some wild fantasies with the expectation that they're actually going to happen? They might seem to be daydreaming about some form of success that will be coming their way even if it seems so out of the realms of possibility you might want to laugh.

Expect Special Treatment

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Does your friend often end up treating your relationship as if you're lucky to be the one spending time with them? If they expect you to be rolling out the red carpet for them (or cook and clean for them) then you might find this is quite the big red flag and something you should avoid.

Take Advantage Of Others

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One of the most tell-tale signs that someone might be narcissistic is if they try and take advantage of the people around them. They tend to prioritize their needs and desires over the feelings and well-being of people that supposedly call them friends. You probably want better than that!

Can't Maintain Relationships

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Narcissistic people will often find it difficult to maintain some long-lasting and healthy relationships with friends and partners. If they have a history of broken relationships then it could be likely that their self-centred behaviour might have put a strain on their length.

Usually Charismatic

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The problem with narcissists is that they're usually quite charismatic and that charming nature can usually make them quite appealing initially. Although they're very likable to begin with though, once you've been drawn in just be aware that you might begin to notice some issues.

Jealous Of Others

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Narcissistic friends can often display signs of struggling to deal with some feelings of jealousy when other people around them start to achieve some form of success.  They might choose to undermine your accomplishments or become competitive to try and out do what you've done.


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If the person you're hanging around with is friends with or knows some popular people then you might be used to hearing them name-dropping. They can enjoy using stories they might not even be that involved in using a popular person's name to try and boost their own image.

Expect A Lot Of Others

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Not only do narcissists appear to be very interested in their own image and improving it, they'll also expect that you see this as well. Because of this they might then begin to expect that you're going to give them a lot of attention and admiration to help cater to their needs.

Believe They're Special

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Narcissists tend to believe that they're special in comparison to others and this inflated self-importance can become quite infuriating. Their own belief that they're unique can make it quite difficult for them to empathize with others or understand they might not be as important as they think.

Frequent Bragging

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Narcissistic individuals can often be prone to bragging about their own achievements and experiences towards everyone, not just their 'friends'. This self-promotion technique can often help make them feel as though they're better than others and hopefully try and maintain that.

Can't Admit Mistakes

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Another toxic trait that seems to be common within narcissists is the inability to be able to admit that they're wrong or apologize with sincerity. They might even try to deflect their blame on to others or make excuses in order to try and protect their own self-esteem from deteriorating.


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Impatience is another quite common issue that you'll find with a narcissist, if things aren't going their way or they aren't the center of attention they might begin to become irritable. If their needs aren't being met you might want to leave their vicinity for a little while.

Seeking Compliments

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Narcissistic friends can often exhibit a consistent need for some validation and some compliments at the same time too. They rely on praise and reassurance in order to help try and boost their own ego. The best way for them to do so is to have the positive opinions of others and often quite one-sided.

Relationships Are Shallow

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One of the defining characteristics of narcissist is their tendency to engage in some of the most shallow relationships possible. They form connections based on what others can provide them which could be social status, material benefits or just attention and not the connection most people look for.

Invade Personal Space

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They can also struggle with other people's personal boundaries, both the physical and the emotional. They might not choose to respect your need for privacy and personal space, often choosing to try and delve in to your personal matters without you even giving any form of consent.

Projecting Negativity

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One of the biggest red flags that anyone could display is projecting negativity on to others. Narcissists will often try to avoid being confronted by their own insecurities by projecting it on to other people. They might criticize you for things that they even do themselves.

Criticize Others

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Like I just said, they can criticize others for things that they actually do themselves and act as though it's natural! Criticism is a very common tool in a narcissists arsenal  and it can help them elevate themselves by diminishing you and the other people around them.

See Everything As A Competition

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To a narcissistic person, everything can be seen as a competition even if you're just spending time together as friends. They will often strive to try and outdo you in casual aspects of life as a way to try and assert some form of dominance or superiority, which can leave you feeling on guard constantly.

Selective Memory

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This is quite a remarkable ability to be honest, a narcissist can quickly and quite conveniently forget or distort facts and events to fit the narrative that suits them the best. It can be quite frustrating to have to try and have honest conversations with someone who tries to twist reality to suit them.

Obsessed With Appearance

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We all want to make sure we look somewhat presentable, but a narcissist can become overly fixated on their physical appearance and expect others to feel the same way. They might choose to prioritize superficial attributes over substance and judge people based solely on their looks.

They Interrupt You

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Another common behaviour among these kinds of people is their habit of interrupting conversations to redirect the focus back to themselves. They might appear impatient when you're speaking as they eagerly wait to be able to take over the conversation from you and dominate it...

They Only Want To Talk About Themselves

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And once that they're able to dominate the conversation then the most glaring sign that they're a narcissist is that they're only talking about themselves. They can monopolize the conversation and rarely show a genuine interest in your life or the others they're spending time with.

Hating Standing In Queues

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As I've already mentioned they can be very impatient and therefore it's no surprise that they hate standing in queues. They might even choose to view the rules around queueing as beneath them and when other people catch wind of their huffing it might prove an issue.

Focus On Their Social Media Appearance

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We all want to get the right pictures of for our social media pages, but a narcissist might end up obsessing over their presence too much. They might try and carefully curate the perfect Instagram page to try and appear flawless and hope viewers will become enviable of them.

Mood Swings

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It's natural for people to have have mood swings, but a narcissist might end up going through lengthy periods of extreme self-confidence to self-doubt at the flip of the coin. The rollercoaster of emotions that they end up going through might leave you walking on eggshells.

The Need To Argue

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Annoyingly, they also seem to have this compulsive need to have to argue with you and always be right, even if they're going to be wrong! They will thrive on conflicting with you and they might even choose to engage in an argument with you just to be able to assert some dominance over people for a bit.