How To Continue A Bond With A Deceased Loved One

By Nick Hadji 8 months ago

1. Keep a special item of their clothing

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It could be anything from their favorite scarf to a cozy cardigan, but keeping something special that belonged to your loved one is a comforting way to feel connected to them. Whenever you wear the item, you will feel closer and more bonded to them.Original content sourced from Femanin.com

2. Light a candle in their memory

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Lighting a candle may only seem like a small gesture to feel closer to your loved one, but sometimes the little things can be the most powerful. Whether you decide to light a candle every day or just on certain occasions, it gives you a moment in the day to reflect.

3. Finish a project they were working on

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If there was a project your loved one was working on or  something they were involved in, you could always take over to fulfill their mission. This will make you feel more connected to them and they would be pleased that you have carried on their legacy. 

4. Raise money for charity in their memory

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If you want to keep the memory of your deceased loved one alive and make a difference in the world, raising money for charity in their name will achieve both of those goals. You could complete a challenge or host a fundraising event to make money and donate to your chosen cause.

5. Put up photos of them

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This one may seem obvious, but sometimes people feel pressured into taking photos of their deceased loved one down because they are not around anymore or if it makes someone feel uncomfortable. But having lots of photos up can make you feel closer to your loved one when you see their smile.

6. Establish a scholarship in their memory

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One great way to stay connected with your deceased loved one and help others at the same time is to establish a scholarship in their memory. By choosing something they were passionate about, you could award someone each year with the opportunity to fulfill their dreams.

7. Involve them in special occasions

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Just because your loved one isn’t physically here anymore, doesn’t mean they can’t be involved in special occasions where their presence was always treasured. You may want to come up with a personal way to commemorate them and encourage others to remember their loved one.

8. Fulfil their dreams

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If there was something your deceased loved one had always wanted to achieve, do it for them! It could be anything from backpacking around the world to learning how to play the guitar, but this will make you feel more connected to them as you carry out their dreams.

9. Celebrate their birthday and other special occasions

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Big occasions such as birthdays can be difficult when someone has passed away, but just because they are not around to celebrate these events with you doesn’t mean you can’t still plan something special. This will help you keep a bond with your loved one.

10. Use a journal to tell them about your day

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If you miss being able to just pick up the phone or sit and have a cup of tea chatting to your loved one about how your day was, you could try using a journal to replicate this interaction. This can be a good outlet to discuss how your day was and express your feelings.

11. Keep something special that belonged to them

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Although you can keep as much as you want, having one special piece that you keep on you at all times can make you feel more bonded to your deceased love one. Choose a small item which is easy to carry about or wear so you will feel close to them at all times.

12. Leave an empty chair at the dinner table for special occasions

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If you really miss your deceased love one, especially on big celebratory occasions like Christmas or a wedding, you can always try leaving an empty chair at the dinner table to enhance the presence of that person in the room and keep their memory alive. 

13. Imagine what advice they would give you when you’re struggling

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It can be overwhelming if you’re having a tough time or you need to make a difficult decision, but just because you’re loved one isn’t here anymore doesn’t mean they can’t give you a helping hand. Try and imagine what advice they would give you based on the type of the person they were.

14. Connect with others online to keep their memory alive

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It can be difficult to talk about your deceased love one to people who don’t understand your grief, which is why you could try connecting with people online who are in a similar position to you. This will give you a space to keep talking about your loved one and feel more connected to them.

15. Tell new people about them

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Although some people may try and avoid bringing up their deceased loved one to people who didn’t know them in case they may find this a difficult topic to engage with, you’d be surprised how understanding people are. They probably want to hear stories about them.

16. Keep talking to them

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Although at first it may feel strange to speak out loud to someone who isn’t physically there, it doesn’t mean they can’t hear you in spirit. Eventually it will become a normal habit and it can be a comforting way to keep feeling connected to your loved one.

17. Write them letters

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If you don’t feel comfortable talking to your deceased loved one, you can try writing to them instead. You can use a pen and paper to write physical letters or use an online tool. It is your choice to keep the letters or get rid of them depending on how you feel.

18. Live each day trying to make them proud

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Be it a spouse, a parent, grandparent, child, or friend, we often struggle knowing our loved one won’t be there for accomplishments and milestones. Taking time to recognise that your loved one would be proud of you for a specific accomplishment can be comforting and remind us how we continue to be connected to our loved one.

19. Visit their favourite restaurant

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Food is the key to the heart, which is why visiting your deceased loved ones favourite restaurant and enjoying a meal can make you feel bonded to them. They may not be there with you, but it will provide you with a comforting feeling that they are present with you.

20. Try white light meditation

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Depending on your religious or spiritual beliefs, you may want to try white light meditation which involves connecting to the soul of your loved one that lives on after death. The aim of the meditation is to open yourself up to receiving messages from them.

21. Take up a hobby they enjoyed

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Taking up a hobby that your loved on enjoyed will not only make you feel closer to them, but it is also a good way to spend your free time and help heal your grief. Depending on the hobby you take up, you might even make some friends and discover a new passion.

22. Make their favourite comfort meal

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We all have comfort foods that feel nostalgic and remind us of certain people, so make sure you don’t avoid your deceased loves ones favourite meal. Cooking can be a therapeutic activity and enjoying their comfort meal will bring back fond memories.

23. Reach out to people they were close with in the past

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Depending on the relationship you had with your loved one, you might find it comforting to reach out to people they used to be close with in the past. Finding out more about them and sharing stories will make you feel closer to your loved one than ever before.

24. Consider their opinion when making decisions

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When you have a close relationship with someone, you start to understand their way of thinking and you can almost predict what their opinion would be on something. This is why you can still consider what your loved one would think even if they are no longer here.

25. Visit their grave or memorial site

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Although this may seem like an obvious way to stay connected to your deceased love one, a lot of people may overlook the power of taking some time out by yourself to sit at the grave or memorial site. Putting effort into maintaining the appearance and laying flowers is also a good way to gain purpose. 

26. Plan a special event for their death anniversary

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As the years go on, you may feel like a big event for your loved ones death anniversary is unnecessary but by continuing to make effort on this date each year is a good way to keep that bond going. You can plan an event with friends and family or create a special tradition.

27. Plant a tree in their memory

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Trees represent life and growth, so a good way to keep the spirit of your deceased loved one alive is to plant a special tree in their memory. This will also create a private and safe place that you can visit to feel more connected to them in nature.

28. Go on a trip they had always dreamed of doing

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Although some people may find it difficult to live through experiences without their loved one by their side, you can also gain a lot of comfort from going on special trips they dreamed of doing. It will help you feel more connected to them and strengthen your bond.

29. Turn their Facebook profile into a memorial page

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It can be painful to come across your loved ones Facebook page as it installs the reality that they are no longer here. However, you can request for their profile to be turned into a memorial page which means people can still interact with them to keep their memory alive.

30. Listen to their favourite music

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Music is a powerful tool that can help us relax, express how we feel and improve our well-being. This is why listening to music that your deceased loved one enjoyed or if it was something that you bonded over can be a comforting way to stay connected to them.

31. Visit the places they loved the most

Image source/ RedditVisit the places that they held close to their hearts and spend some time there. The places they would visit often and used to talk about fondly. Here you'll feel closer and more connected to them, because you are in a place which they connected to emotionally.

32. Spray the perfume they used to wear

Image source/ RedditSmell is the most nostalgic of all the senses we have. Have you ever noticed that when you smell a certain smell or spray old perfume it suddenly transports you to a completely new place and you visit old memories and feelings? Try spraying their old perfume to remember your deceased love one.

33. Celebrate their birthday

Image source/ PinterestTheir birthday can be a very difficult time with you, on a day that was once about them it is very hard to face the fact that they are no longer with you. But try celebrating it anyway in whatever way you like. This way, you will feel like you are honouring their memory and keeping the connection.

34. Write down all of your memories with that person

Image source/ RedditOne of the best things to do is to sit down with paper and a pen and let your memories fall from your mind to the paper. Get all of those fond memories, fun times, little anecdotes down so that you can read them whenever you miss them and keep those memories strong in your mind as time passes by.

35. Raise a toast to them at special events

Image source/ RedditRaise your glass, make a toast to them at special events. Just because they are no longer physically here doesn't mean they aren't with you. Show you still love them and remember them in company by raising a glass to them at special occasions and mentioning them in your toast.

36. Remember a quote they used to say

Image source/ RedditSometimes we link quotes with certain people. It might not even be a quote, it may be their own unusual saying that they used to like, a word they used to use all of the time. It doesn't matter either way. Get it printed on a plaque and hang it up in your house as a special way to commemorate them.

37. Talk to them in your internal monologue

Image source/ blazetyYour internal monologue is talking non stop, it commentates your own life, and speaks to you whenever you need it. So use your internal monologue if you don't want to speak to them out loud. This way, you can imagine what they say back to you too and have a kind of internal conversation.

38. Watch videos of them in the past

Image source/ YouTubeIf you are lucky enough to have any videos of them from the past, or even in recent times before they passed away then try watching them. At first this can be painful, but after time you can watch these with joy remembering them for how they really were.

39. Pray for them

Image source/ cbctotally depends on if you are religious or not. And if not, this one is not for you which is totally fine! But if you do like to pray, send them a message and pray that they are watching over you. This could help you feel like you are or can become more connected to them.

40. Take up some spiritual practices

Image source/ RedditAlternatively, you may be into spiritual practices. Or, you may want to give it a try. Spirituality can take any form you like crystals, meditation, divination or anything along the spiritual path. So get spiritual and try to feel connected with your deceased love one.

41. Put together a photo album

Image source/ RedditPutting together a photo album of photos is a very good idea to get all of your memories in one place. Somewhere you can look to when you want to feel connected to them and remember them. You can make it personal or add words or make it however you like.

42. Create your own memorial

Image source/ RedditA memorial can be anything, it could be a photo surrounded by some candles or it could be a natural space with lights and special objects. It can be very personal to you and your deceased loved one. But whatever form you make it, it can be a special place for to go and spend time and reflect.

43. Write down their stories

Image source/ RedditThey may never have written down any of their stories in their life. So you can do it for them. Write down their stories. You may not even be in that story but it doesn't matter. This is a collection of things they have told you about and thing they have done in their life no matter hoe great or small.

44. Channel their spirit when you feel afraid

Image source/ RedditWhen you feel afraid, think of them. Think that you now not only have you courage, but their courage as they look down on you and support you. This way you'll never feel as though they are far from you and you'll always feel that you have their courage within you too.

45. Make them proud

Image source/ RedditGo and make them proud. We're sure they were already proud of you - they may have even told you this. But live knowing that they would be proud of you. Let them influence you in a good way, making decisions that are good for you and those around you.

46. See them in beautiful things

Image source/ RedditLook around at the beauty that surrounds us on a daily basis. See them in the beauty, in a flower budding near you path, in the sun shining down or see them in a red robin, or all of the beautiful little things you notice. Not only will you feel connected, but you'll appreciate what's around you more.

47. Practice a morning ritual of reflecting on a time with them you were grateful for

Image source/ RedditMorning routines can really set you up for the day. It's becoming ever more popular to create a morning routine which involves self care and journaling. Try incorporating this as well as reflecting on the times you had with your deceased one and the things you were grateful for.

48. Plant a tree in their name

Image source/ RedditPlanting a tree in their name can be a very cathartic thing to do because it is something you can watch grow and nurture. It will forever remind you of them when you see it. Plant it somewhere visible, in your garden for example to keep their memory close!

49. If your loved one was cremated, put some of their ashes inside a ring

Image source/ PinterestIf your deceased loved one was cremated, then a very special way to use some of the ashes of your loved one is to place them inside a ring or a piece of jewellery. This way, they are literally with you at all times. And, every time you look at it you'll remember them and feel closer to them.

50. Keep your living loved ones close

Image source/ blogspotDon't dwell on the past so much so that you forget to focus on the loved ones around you and what is in front of you. One way to honour your deceased loved one the most is to get even closer to the loved ones you have around you now and focus on making those connections even stronger.

51. Take note of signs

Image source/ PinterestSigns are everywhere...we are just too busy or preoccupied (with our head stuck in a phone) to see them. But if you look up, look around you're boundtosee the signs. It may be a white feather, it could be a cloud in a particular shape or a budding flower - signs they are with us.

52. Print photos of your loved one and send them to your family

Image source/ RedditPhotos are one of the best ways to remember and stay connected to our deceased loved ones because we can actually see them. And it is a very easy thing to do. Why not print out even more and share them amongst your loved ones so that you can all share the memories together?

53. Leave an object exactly as they left it

Image source/ Redditwe see objects left just as they were in the very place your loved one left them it can be painful initially because it as thought they are very much still here. Yet, once the pain subsides it can be comforting picturing them doing what they loved.

54. Display one of their achievements in your home

Image source/ RedditYou miss your loved one, and you're proud of them. Remind yourself of this and everyone who visits your home by displaying one of their achievements in prized asce. It codiscuss drawings they did, a medal they won, and a certificate they earned. Whatever it is, it doesn'ones'tter!

55. Go to a place you both went together

Image source/ RedditPlaces hold very special places in our hearts as they are attached with memories. So when you visit a place you may find memories of the past fnowhereto you. Go somewhere that the two of you came together and had fun, somewhere that you both help as a special place in your hheart

56. Pick out one of their old belongings and give it to another of their loved ones

Image source/ RedditOne of the best ways to keep connected to your deceased loved ones is to keep their memory alive not only within yourself but in the people around you. Therefore, if you have a few of their belongings it could be a nice idea to gift one of your present loved ones something that used to belong to them.

57. Buy them a gift at Christmas

Image source/ RedditChristmas is one of those times we feel it the most, when our deceased one is gone and we think about the times past. But, to keep connected with your deceased loved one try getting them a small gift. Just a personal and thoughtful gift when you see something that reminds you of them.

58. Meet up with their old friend to swap stories on their birthday

Image source/ RedditMeeting up with their loved ones is a great idea ass we have discuses. But it is a nice tradition to start meeting up with the friends of your deceased loved ones birthday to share stories and laugh about past memories and keep their spirit with you.

59. Adopt their pet

Image source/ RedditThis one all depends on whether your loved one had a pet in the first place, and whether that pet had no where else to go to. But adopting the pet or visiting the pet is a great way to connect because animals and owners have a special bond which cannot be underestimated.

60. Visit the places with the most significant memories together

Image source/ RedditA nice idea to reconnect is to visit those places which hold extra special significance. For example the first ever memory you have together, the last ever memory you have together, a trip that brought you closer, or a place where one of you revealed some exciting news.