10+ Subtle Signs Of An Alpha Male

By Nick Hadji 8 months ago

He always wants to lead the conversation

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You've probably already noticed that speaking to an alpha guy doesn't take much effort at all. An alpha male will ensure he leads the conversation and fills gaps of silence. This can be hard if you're powerful in a conversation yourself but it's a strong trait for any male. If you're talkative too you might just be a good match and the conversation can go on for a good amount of time.

His peers look up to him a lot

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If a guy is an alpha male he's pretty much what every guy wants to be. His peers will definitely look up to him and aspire to be just like the guy in question. Don't be surprised if other guys ask him for tips or advice because they'll know they are getting it from exactly who they want to be. They might just become an agony-aunt without wanting to be!

His status is really important to him

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Following on from the point above, if a guys' peers look up to and want to be him, this gives an alpha a big confidence boost. Alpha males want to be liked and looked up to so if a guy is asking for advice an alpha will thrive from it all. It's really important to them that they're liked and that people aspire to be them in all aspects of their lives.

They make snap decisions very quickly

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If a guy isn't an alpha male he'll probably take a long time trying to decide where to go out to eat. However, this is pretty much the opposite of an alpha male who thrives in a decision making setting. They'll be able to communicate what they want and usually what they think is the "best" thing to do in pretty much any situation. Don't think he'll take your opinion into account!

Always pays for the bill in public

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Ever been in a bar and the waiter brings the bill and you both sit awkwardly looking at each other to who will pay? Well, this situation would be pretty rare with an alpha male due to the power they want to have, forcing them to pay for the bill. This can be a negative for an alpha though as they can be used in situations when people know that they'll just pay for everything.

They are emotionally available

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Being emotionally available means that you can process the feelings you have and be able to explain and demonstrate them in the correct way. This is something an alpha male would find very easy and it can come quite naturally to them... especially in relationships. Many women are not used to men being so emotionally available and can be taken aback by it.

They're a natural leader in life

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It's not uncommon to see an alpha male to lead many situations in life and they'll usually find themselves in a job which requires them to lead people. This type of role is perfect for an alpha and allows them to use all of their positive traits to lead their team to success. This being said, they can find it difficult to be managed by other people in work.

Challenges don’t bother this type of guy

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Although a lot of men are faced with many challenges, some choose to hide away from them but this really isn't a way that an alpha male would face the challenges at hand. They'd choose to face the challenges and work through it in the best and quickest way possible. They're always motivated and try to see the best outcome for any kind of issue or problem they're faced with in life.

Money is never a problem for this guy

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The motivation that alpha males have will usually mean they do pretty well financially in life. This can be down to the goals they set and the will power they have to achieve and succeed. Having said this, it means that an alpha probably has no problem with money and you'll see this if you're ever in a relationship with them. They may be pretty humble with it but they rarely have financial problems.

He cares about the way he looks

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An alpha male will think a lot of themselves and so they have to make sure that they meet these exceptions by keeping up with the best fashion trends and statements. You might find a good amount of alphas in the gym keeping their figures slick. They also might do this in the way they dress and always be out looking for new clothes to wear... so it's safe to say alphas will take care of themselves.

He also cares about the way his partner looks

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Given the amount of care an alpha puts into the way they look, they'll probably expect this from the person they end up with. Partners might be expected to come to the gym with them to keep in shape, or they might want to take them out to the mall to pick up some new clothes to make sure they're on trend too. A free shopping trip doesn't seem too bad a set up, right?

They can be relatively humble

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Although, an alpha male has probably done quite well in life and has a good amount of money behind them they aren't usually the type to brag about it. Typically, they'll probably be pretty humble when it comes to showing you the money or how they live their life. Being as motivated as they are, sometimes they might not even see the privilege they have and strive for more.

They can actually have a huge amount of respect for women!

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The respect an alpha male gives to the women in their life is something that all men should take note of. These alphas know just how to treat their lady and will ensure they meet every need that they have. This might be taking them shopping, on nice dates or even just giving them the quality time they deserve. Some women might not be used to this treatment at first.

They're always making the plans for the day

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Because alpha males know how to treat a woman, the dates they plan are usually pretty show-stopping. Alphas never beat around the bush, so trust them to start planning early on. If you end up with an alpha you probably won't have to plan any dates and the guy will prefer if you leave it all to them to sort. After all, alphas love control in all aspects of their life.

They're extremely protective of their family

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If an alpha male has a family then they'll worship them all to the ground. This is why many women often choose to build a family with an alpha because they know they'll be looked after and cherished by them, but at what cost? It's a pretty attractive trait for many women and often it's a big stipulation for them to find a family-men during their dating period.

He knows where and how he can improve

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Although an alpha male sounds like they pretty much have it all they're far from perfect. An alpha will always be aware of the flaws they have and work to make them better for themselves and the people around them. Given they're in touch with their emotions, alphas are often aware of anything that's bothering them, and won't take too long to try and fix it.

They're happy to work on their flaws

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Following on from the point above, alpha males can usually recognize their flaws but also have the motivation to do something about it. For example, maybe an alpha has gotten out of shape and lost the physique he used to be proud of. Many men will be happy to live in the new body but an alpha will work tirelessly to get back to the shape they cherished.

Alphas males can be very strong-willed

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To be able to do all of the things mentioned in this list, it's important that an alpha is strong-willed. They must be able to fight any temptation and work hard on themselves to become better. While the strong will of an alpha can be positive, it can also hinder them in situations. For example, arguments with loved ones can lead the alpha to believe that they're always on the right side.

An alpha male is usually physically strong

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It's not surprising that an alpha male stereotype is very physically fit. They're motivated personalities will usually push them to get to that gym while other men would sooner sit at home! You'll definitely spot a few alphas every time you head to the gym, some even go several times a day! Alphas are obsessed with their body image, and will want people to know they're striving for the best.

Alphas usually have strong mentalities

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Alpha males aren't only known to be physically fit; their mental health also appears to be in check too. As mentioned before, they are emotionally available people and love to have control over their lives. If an alpha isn't happy with something they'll definitely change it which keeps them mentally happy. It's also why an alpha will spend a lot of time improving themselves.

They can come across as quite upfront

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Because of the confidence and drive that alpha males have, they might come across as quite upfront to other people. Simply, they know what they want and aren't afraid to say it at all. Many people dislike this trait in alpha men and can be put off by it. However, for the people that do, they get a straight talking man who doesn't shy away from what they want.

He often takes the lead in social situations

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It goes without saying that if a man has confidence and is quite upfront then in social settings they'll regularly lead in conversations. They might be the one to place the order for a large group of people, for example. They might also be the person who demands attention when talking, and also leads the conversation topics. If an alpha gets bored of what everyone's talking about, they'll change the topic quickly!

They always set goals they can achieve

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Even if an alpha's life looks perfect they'll always have goals that they're trying to succeed and challenge themselves at. They might have bought a house but then wish to own another one. It could also be in a family setting of having goals for their children and working hard to get them to the place they believe is success. An alpha will never stop trying to improve.

He has great posture

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Bad posture can come from having a lack of confidence; those who stand tall are usually quite confident (there's plenty of TED talks on it!). When it comes to alpha males being confident is really no issue. That's why their posture is usually so good, they have a lot of self-belief. Several studies show that increased confidence dramatically effects posture.

They can communicate in any given situation

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Communication is hard even in easy conversations but being able to communicate when things are tough is a big skill. Alpha males are able to say exactly how they feel and put it into words that accurately reflect those feelings. This is a good skill to have when it comes to confrontation and talking out issues. Alpha males may be seen to have less arguments with their partners.

Alpha men are pretty much always outgoing

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With their social situation skills and ability to lead their way through life, it's hardly surprising that an alpha male holds a very outgoing trait. They believe in themselves and this shines through in their personalities and the way they hold themselves. They'll actively seek adventure, aren't afraid to stand up in public, and will speak to pretty much anybody they cross paths with.

Alpha men tend to have high self-esteem

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To be able to be outgoing and confident it requires a great amount of self-esteem. Alpha males tend to have loads of self-esteem because of how much they really believe in themselves. They're goal-driven individuals and by meeting them goals the self-esteem always increases. You might see the more goals they hit the more their self-esteem and confidence increase within them.

An alpha male will have a good sense of humor

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Having a good sense of humor is a very attractive trait and this is something which alpha men have naturally. In a social setting they'll be the ones who make people laugh and get everybody cracking jokes with each other. You might also notice when you're with an alpha that the laughs never seem to dwindle or die; growing up, they were probably the "class clown"!

A woman's feelings are often validated around an alpha male

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Not only are alpha men able to notice their own feelings they're also great at seeing their partners'. Women who are with alphas may feel they're asked often by their partner about their feelings and always feel listened to and heard. Alpha men can even notice the slightest change in partners and pick up on that to find out what has changed in how they feel.

An extroverted personality

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Finally, with all the points raised so far, an extroverted personality is definitely expected from an alpha male. They are out there and are great at being the center of attention. They can also bring introverts out of their shell with their ability to notice how other people are feeling. Alphas want everyone to be as happy as them and they'll definitely work hard for it.

How an alpha male shows his love

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It's one thing to recognize an alpha male, but if you're hoping to date one - or maybe you're wondering whether the alpha male in your life loves you as much as you're hoping he does! - there are many ways alpha males specifically show their affection, attraction and love. Oftentimes people think alpha males don't love as openly or deeply, but they just show it in a different way!

They prefer a partner who isn't too submissive

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When people think of alpha males, it's easy to think they want a more introverted or submissive partner, because their dominance and confidence might take up all the room enough for two! But it's actually not the case. While it's different for everyone of course, they would prefer a partner who isn't too submissive, because they need someone who can keep up with their goal-setting and fast pace.

Respect is important

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This goes without saying in any relationship, but to an alpha male, they need open respect at all times, because they need to be made to feel important in a relationship, and that you're equals. An alpha male won't have time for a partner who shows them lack of respect who belittles (whether accidentally or not) everything they're working to achieve!

Showing his love: he might frighten other potential partners off

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An alpha male might still do this when he's in an official relationship with you rather than just on the casual dating seen trying to hook up. It isn't because he's insecure or jealous of attention you're getting from others, it's just that he's literally trying to mark his place as alpha - he's the man in your life, and he's going to let other men who think they have a chance know that!

There's no shortage of passion

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An alpha male might struggle to openly express love through words or talking about feelings, but that doesn't mean he isn't going to show it. Passion is one of the biggest things you can expect from an alpha who cares about you, and this is particularly true in the bedroom. So if you're wondering how much he loves you, pay attention to how often he's showing that physical passion!

He might not say the L word, but he'll show it in different ways

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Not openly expressing his love easily can also apply to the biggest way of all - saying 'I love you'. This is the key way most people want their partners to express their love, but it's not easy for everyone. So if he hasn't said it, he'll definitely try to make up for it in different ways by showing you his love, rather than telling you. And you'll just know!

He'll hug you

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Putting your arms around someone is very much a protective gesture, and protection is what an alpha male is all about in relationships. The hug is obviously also a gesture of affection and closeness, so by hugging you all the time, he's combining the need to show you that he cares but also to show you that he's protecting you and you're safe with him.

He tries to do the simple acts of chivalry

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An alpha male also takes pride in those 'traditional' male values, like paying for the bill, holding doors open and opening the car door for you. He'll make an effort every day, and every time you're out, to do this for you, even speeding up walking in front of you so that he can get the door for you! Sometimes he won't need to say anything, because by doing this, he's showing you that he cares.

He'll probably call you - A LOT

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In this day and age, calls instead of messaging can be a scary thing! Even more so when someone you're dating is willingly calling you because they want to talk to you all the time (a lot of people don't get that!). With an alpha, calling you all the time takes precedence because it's an easier way for them to check you're okay and ask you things. It might get overwhelming the amount they call, so you need to tell them if it's too much!

He'll hold your hand in public

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Okay, so most couples do this, but an alpha male makes a point of it for the same reason they like to hug a lot - it's a protective gesture, and they like you to feel safe with them and hold onto you so you're close to them. Not only that, a lot of alphas are about that 'public statement' - so they want to be seen walking into a public place with you, holding your hand, as a 'power couple' act.

And he'll hold your bag or coat for you, too

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An alpha also wants to make your life easier on a daily basis, in the same way they like to hold the door open for you or offer to be the one to drive. In public if you have a bag, purse or jacket that you're carrying around, he's going to take them for you and carry them - you won't even need to ask him, and it'll seem like the most natural thing in the world for him to do.

He'll make sure you get home safe

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Any decent partner will always do this, but with an alpha, it's not so much about booking you a cab or telling you to text them when you get home safe - he will directly make sure you get home safe by either walking you home himself (right to the front door and watching you go inside) or taking the cab ride with you and catching another one himself back home, just to make sure you're okay.

He'll discuss his plans for the future

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An alpha male is someone extremely goal oriented, which means they're not someone living day by day. He likely has a plan for the next five years, maybe even ten years, in terms of his life and love goals. While he might not directly talk to you about 'so where are we going?', if he opens up to you about what he wants in the future, it's a sign he's hinting he's serious about you.

He tends to keep cool during arguments

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An alpha male could sometimes have a reputation of being hot-headed, but it's often not the case - and especially not with relationship fallouts! An alpha feels like they have to be the model leader, in which case they'll do their best to keep cool in order to take control of a situation, rather than letting their emotions rule them. So if he does this with you, it's likely because he cares.

He puts a lot of thoughts into gifts

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For someone whom actions speak louder than words, gift-giving is definitely going to be one of the biggest ways he communicates his affection for you! And because of that, he's not just going to buy you any gift either - you can expect him to put A LOT of thought into any gift he gives you, no matter how big or small, because he wants you to know how much you matter to him.

And he probably buys you a lot of them, too!

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And gift-giving is probably very much his love language, which is why you can expect a lot of gifts being bought for you by an alpha - and not just on celebrations or occasions, either, as he'll likely buy you random gifts no matter where you are. This isn't the same as love bombing, as an alpha will consistently do this no matter what stage you are in your relationship, because it's their way of continually showing love.

He'll be proud of your achievements

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It may sound a little shallow, but an alpha is going to be proud of your achievements because of this 'power couple' and status he likes to have. This mentality doesn't mean he's not genuinely proud of you - he'll be thrilled when he sees you achieving your own goals because he knows how important goals are to him, too. It's just a bonus that you can be a goal-setting couple together!

And a true alpha will not feel threatened

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Some people also think that alphas might not like a partner who is too successful, or maybe even more successful than them, but a true alpha won't feel like that. Alphas have bags of self-confidence and they have faith in themselves, which means they aren't going to be insecure when their partner achieves good things. If they love you, they'll only be happy for you!

He's very much focused on the here and now

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While an alpha is definitely planning for the future, he also cares a lot about the here and now. He basically isn't concerned with the past, whether it's his own past, your past, or things you've gone through in the past as a couple. He's not going to bring up past arguments or issues he had in the past - he's only bothered about how you're doing now, and taking the next step, rather than a step back.

He'll be your home handyman!

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And, of course, an alpha likes to be very physical when it comes to everyday tasks and around the house! So he's definitely going to show his affection by helping you around the house, especially if you don't live together. He'll enjoy helping you fix any appliances that have broken, helping you with some DIY or helping you build new furniture you've bought!